Tag Archive: Dream House Restaurant Sofia


The one who played a song at me about cock-sucking.  Came out tonight, said ‘God’ loudly, and then did an iron fist/velvet glove act with his friend. 

This psychologically violent and rapacious dog (that’s what a non-Christian might say, I’m not supposed to say it, but a non-Christian could and probably would).  The answer is ‘NO’!!  If you read this and see him you can tell him so, from me.  I’m not sure what he is about, or his friend.  I’m getting frightened to talk about my feelings, because people have started making noises about mental health interventions again.  They always hit me early with that.  Today it was the house of Lords.  They were trying to play self-satisfied, melifluous intellectuals.  I started watching from the beginning, about an hour and a half into it.  Baroness whatever her face started the main business, saying ‘question’ like ‘quistion’.  I find that violent, and it affects the way I hear everything.  But I think they were struggling themselves with my post earlier today, the one about coded communication.  I’m hysterical because of the way the encounter with this guy has left me.  I want to prattle.  What is he/are they expressing?  Ignorant, but eager and innocent hunger, or something else?  It was a bit like a childish game to them. A God game.  Who is He going to speak to?  One plays the hard man and the other the soft.  Between them they take what they want.  My thoughts and feelings and the reactions of my body are my business and my responsibility, but I still left feeling I had been clubbed, people are hooking on to me, and my tongue is tingling.  The God fashion.  Nick someone else’s clothes right off their body if you don’t know how else to do it.  Oh My God!  Why can’t they leave women alone?  And the cocksucking bit.  it might make sense to them, and I think I can see the sense it makes, but it’s still wrong and horribly violent.  Just where do they get it from?  I’ve wondered if that is the way communists dealt with Christians before, as a form of persecution or something.  Knowing neither the language nor the history is not helping me.  I wonder if they are like the Russians, who deny their own bloody history, saying it never happened?  If they are, I’m not going to find out the truth from them.  They had the radio on.  When the headscarf guy laughed and said ‘he’s talking to you’, who was he talking about?  I thought he meant God.  Maybe he meant the man on the radio.  I don’t know, I left trying not to be pawed, and as I did they banged on something (that’s common too).  It’s horrific.  It’s mental rape.  I’m so tired.  I managed to get my shopping today.  This wasn’t how I expected to feel at the end of it.  I had several groups pass me in near silence today, then laugh loudly just as they passed.  That’s what made me start wondering about the communist bit.  Whatever it is to them, to me it feels like hatred.  Maybe I’m just expressing a conscience in trouble.  Maybe it’s witchcraft.  I’m just tired.  I’m too tired to analyse it.  I think writing confuses my feelings more than anything else I do.  Especially when I’m being stalked.  It gives people a hook.  I keep losing my page connection at significant points.  I don’t know if it’s a psychic thing or if I’m getting what they used to call ‘booted’ in the chatrooms I started out on.  That makes most sense to me, but sometimes it happens even when I’m not connected to the internet, also at significant points.  I shouldn’t write like this, it’s trash.  Is it me?  Is it just a personality and a relational problem?  No.  I watched the House of Lords today.  Something was going on.  It might be just me, FOR me, but for other people exactly the same kind of thing is just them?  I will never be able to socialise with most of these people, they are just too weird.  Maybe for ‘weird’ read hungry.  I need to sort my computer out, it keeps crashing after I installed a substandard device.  When I get my head clear, the people who walk past do the weird stuff.  And the cafe is messing with the radio, and playing ‘get God’ games.  I’m writing like this in a desperate attempt to try and recover myself.

Is this place really as evil as I think it is? 96% Christians?  That has to be a lie.  I don’t even know why they would want to be or give that impression, and if they think psychological violence is the way to do it, I wonder who their examples have been.

I picked up my new glasses today.  I hope I can read with them.  They don’t seem as strong as the ones I lost.

Day 2 – the shouting men are here again.  Hence my ‘organised stalking’ tag.

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Vegetarian Bulgaria Sucks!

Here I am in Bulgaria, right?  Sofia, to be exact.

I checked Happycow.net for vegetarian restaurant outlets in Bulgaria, and the only ones seem to be in Sofia.  Only two of those are completely vegetarian, and don’t the buggers feel their power!

The food is great, but I have never experienced such harassment anywhere.

I got to Sofia, eventually, yesterday, hoping to go to my favourite vegetarian restaurant, which turns out to be closed until 15th August.

Why is it my favourite restaurant?  Is it because English media has been flooded, to my mind, at least, with images of it and suggestions that that is where I should go?  I am a very suggestible person, and I might have got that wrong.

So here I am, back in the only viable alternative, really – Dream House, the restaurant where one of the chefs broke into an aggressive cackle and said I was restaurant crawling (but not to ME, you understand), and then, the last time I was here, he put a CD on, just as I was leaving, which was what I understand to be heavy metal, saying something about a man shoving his cock in a woman’s mouth (please excuse me, those are the words of the song, which I need to repeat so you can understand how sexually molested I felt as I left that day.

Anyway, today here I am, having needed somewhere to eat.  It started off OK, I was fairly much in control of how I was relating and of my experience.  The man didn’t seem to be around, so that felt safe enough.

I watched some TV on the internet, yesterday’s news, and as I was packing up to go the woman behind the desk said, in English, ‘she’s so rude!’

When I went to pay, I asked her about it, and she denied that it had happened.  She said she always spoke in Bulgarian,  So I said possibly it had been a customer, and accepted I might have been wrong.  Then she became defiant and started laughing at me, saying it was my paranoia, not  theirs. Like, it’s paranoid to call restaurant staff on their rudeness and be upset when they lie about it, especially when my own reason for adopting veganism was spiritual and moral.  I don’t get it.

Anyway, no one stuck up for me, and just now the second girl on shift sat down with a couple of friends, and they were turning round and looking at me and talking.  I can only assume that they were saying what had happened.  They seem to think there is never an excuse for being angry, at least not for me, but they themselves are so rude and either they don’t care about putting it right, or they have strange ideas of how they should.

I hate Bulgaria so far. Every time I try and adjust that and be happy I’m faced with the same stuff.  I have no idea what they are trying to do.  Do they want a bit of me to rub off on them because I am English and they think I am charmed?  I’ve got to praying, ‘OK, God, let them have it.  Let them know how it feels to be me.  Let them experience it themselves’.  I hope they do.  RT et al are dishonest people hiding in the shadows if they refuse to recognise that imprecatory prayers belong to the New Testament as well as the Old.  Peter and Paul both prayed them.  RT et al are hiding behind cowardly dishonesty if they refuse people’s right today to do the same thing.  Anyway, these guys here think they are above anything negative.  I have to carry it on my own, and it’s my problem if I have a problem with that.  It’s my problem if I don’t like restaurant staff calling me rude, laughing with each other, then when I ask them about it they deny it and laugh at me, calling me paranoid.  Squeeky clean vegetarian restaurant, even when they are being abusive.  I’m the one that is supposed to come down out of my miff tree, and if it wasn’t an expectation that I was being vilified for not meeting, that would be the most comfortable thing for me to do.

Fuck em.  It’s not that I don’t care.  How can I not in a situation with such limited options that I thought was going to be good but has turned out to be so thuggishly cruel?

But fuck em anyway.

The worst thing is, when push comes to shove, my ‘favourite’ restaurant is just as bad.  Yesterday I felt we could make progress.  Why?  never mind.  But I get the impression they are reporting me to each other, so I suppse today’s people are going to mess it up for me, even if it could have turned round.  How is it that I always manage to end up being made to feel like the one in the wrong?

Shortly after I came in the man said ‘Jesus’.  In view of the fact that he has subsequently been completely offensive to me and allowed his staff to be (is he the owner?) without making an effort to put it right, I find that in itself completely offensive.  I’m tired of feeling I have to go through life making allowances for everyone but myself.

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